A friend of mine recently sent me a link that made my heart ache.
The link was from the television show “Family Feud” hosted by Steve Harvey.
One of the male contestant was asked the question “what’s the first place that you touch a woman to get her in the mood?”
The contestant answered with- “That would be the lower front…the…(laugh, laugh) vagina.”
Now aside from the dismay one might feel knowing that this is the FIRST place this man goes to turn on his female partner, (as opposed to say…her lips, her neck, her shoulders, etc)- what absolutely horrified me was the complete and total meltdown of everyone on the screen, when the man eventually was able to stutter out the word “vagina”.
From the bedlam that ensued, one would think someone had dropped a shit bomb into a room of 7th grade boys.
What concerned me even more was the reaction of the female contestants.
All 3 women covered their faces in shame, and one woman put her fingers in her ears to prevent herself from hearing that accursed word…vagina.
Now I would expect something like this from a group of 13 year old boys and girls, but that this was the reaction from grown adults is alarming!
If the simple word vagina can bring such terror into the hearts of grown adults, imagine what is happening in their bedrooms….
And women continue to wonder WHY they aren’t having satisfying sex and orgasms.
Can we truly consider ourselves healthy, whole, empowered women when we are afraid of our own vaginas?
This is why I believe that understanding and LOVING you vagina is absolutely an act of anarchy against the status quo.
The status quo would keep you ignorant, fearful, and shameful, to the point of cringing at the thought of your most primal pleasure center.
I will say it again- you can NOT be fully empowered as a women if you are afraid of talking about, looking at, and TOUCHING your own pussy.
Period.
Your pussy doesn’t even belong to you until it has become completely free of shame.
Until then it is still imprisoned in the mind of the patriarchy.
You are able to take it out on loan every once in while. Take it off the shelf, dust it off and let your partner use it for 7 minutes to an hour– but then you must return it to it’s rightful owners- the culture that has conditioned you to fear your own body and deny your birthright to pleasure.
I say- Let’s start a revolution. A revolution of shame free self acceptance, starting at the core of our womanhood, the literal gateway to enlightenment- Our Pussies
How well do YOU understand your Vagina? Tune in below to take your vaginal IQ test and find out!
Devi, Having an honest conversation about pleasure and sex is still difficult for adults in the US even though this is the 21st century. Thank you for this post which shines a light on the topic.
Thank you for commenting Yvonne. So grateful for your encouragement and support. xo
You’re an idiot fabricating a problem.
No one, male or female, is “ashamed” of vaginas, at leaat in the “western” world.
Men worship them, women have them (!) and presumably derive great pleasure from them.
Where is the problem?
THIS is a serious problem- https://www.youtube.com/watch?t=7&v=mWz-QbK4zV0
Given the fact that you are neither a sex educator, nor a woman, your insight into this issue is not actually valid.
“an act of anarchy” seriously? give me a break.
anarchy is behaving responsibly as an independent, uncoerced individual
what does that have to do with “loving your vagina” ???
If you don’t love your pussy you have serious problems, problems that have nothing to do with male hegemony. We’re men and we love pussy, apparently more than you do. I don’t know any man who doesn’t think it’s the most glorious thing in the world – no “shaming” involved…
Your inability to understand the connection made between self love and “anarchy”/rebellion against the status quo is disappointing, but well over 2,000 other people were able to make the connection quite easily, so perhaps try reading the article with your cup a little less full.
I did read the article.
Family Feud is perhaps the most moronic game show ever invented (and apparently reincarnated recently WTF?) and that is saying something. But anyway, I would expect someone saying “VAGINA” on Family Feud would result in an over-the-top juvenile snickering-fest equivalent to dropping “a shit bomb into a room of 7th grade boys”.
However, I fail to see what this has anything to do with your claim that women are ashamed and afraid to touch their own vaginas. If this claim is true, I agree that it is a problem.
And, if so, I’m sorry if some people are so repressed that they are uncomfortable touching themselves, but this has nothing to do inherently with patriarchy or any idiocy displayed on “Family Feud”.
Hell, I’m actually kind of happy that Family Feud has “evolved” to the point where they are no longer too uptight to say “vagina” or “nipples” or “creamy caboose” (whatever the fuck that means…)
This stupid game show exchange actually makes me think that people are getting *more* comfortable with discussing sex and sexuality.
Anyway, I gotta go wack off now.
You should too, if you want – no shame involved.